Saturday, October 9, 2010

Friday - Day 30 Head 'em up; move 'em out. Rawhide!

Do you remember that song?  It was the theme song for a TV western back in the 60s or 70s. All I remember are the words, "Head 'em up; move 'em out. Rawhide!"  Maybe the name of the program was "Rawhide."  Funny that I can't remember the program but I remember that silly song.

If a Borden Collie could help round up and move out these papers, I would rent one. But sadly, papers don't move like cows. They can't be hearded. (Is there such a word as "hearded?") They have to be picked up and moved by me!  But I'm heading them up and moving them out. Got another trash can full today. I grabbed armloads of papers from the stack on my desk that is threatening to avalanche, took them to the dining room and sorted them on the table into categories so they can be filed.

As for herding the pounds, I am having a hard time rounding them up.  They are very elusive. Wednesday night I was up all night working. I ate all night for energy. I didn't even try to keep track of my calories. Yesterday morning I had gained four pounds! 

Yesterday I went on my potato diet.  Had 2 fried eggs and two small potatoes for breakfast. I seasoned the 'taters with garlic powder, paprika and just a little bit of olive oil.  I ate much less over all that day. This morning I was back down to 259. That seemed like a pretty good loss.

Today I continued with my potato routine. Except today I only ate one potato at breakfast. It really does make me feel satisfied and full.  I had a salad of romaine lettuce, a big fat grated carrot, green onions, topped with some grated cheddar cheese for supper. Again, I felt quite full. A few hours later I checked my blood sugar and it was 139.  A little high. I wonder if that potato causes the blood sugar to rise or if it was the sweetened yogurt I had between meals.

It will be interesting to see what my weight is in the morning. But then tomorrow afternoon the ladies at my church are having a fall fun day. We are going to be eating Rib Crib BBQ for lunch, will have bible study and other activities, then late afternoon have a dessert. That could be my Achilles heel.  H-E-L-PPPPPPP!

Lord, help me to only put into my mouth that which is good for me tomorrow, and every day.

1Co 10:31  Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Day 28 - Wednesday Weigh in day! Potatoes are my friend?

The good news is that I did not gain weight on Sunday, which has been my weekly failure point.
Today I am still maintaining 258, which is a 2 pound loss from last week.

At least 50 pounds of paper and junk has gone out my door in the last two days. I'm making progress.

To someone who didn't see me at 280 pounds, I would still look huge at 258.  To someone who hadn't seen me pitching and heaving junk out my door, my office would still look like a dump.  I cannot let how I look discourage me. I will not look svelte in a few weeks. It takes time and consistency. The same with the clutter in my office - baby steps - will get the clutter out of my office.

POTATOES - STARCHES - could they be my friend?  I was watching a program on TV today where a guest doctor was explaining that for thousands of years whole people groups consisted mainly on starches and did so in good health and without being obese. 

He said that we have been told that starches are bad because they convert to sugar. We are told to eat less carbohydrates and yet we are a nation of sick, obese people.  He said that a graveyard of gladiators was discovered recently. Gladiator's diets consisted of starches, and right before their fights they would eat barley for a day or two. They were called "barley eaters."  Scientists have analyzed their bones and their bones were denser and showed to be more healthy than the surrounding population.

He also talked about the 3 Sisters - the diet of the Indians: corn, beans and squash.  The Native Americans were healthy and lean.  I've often wondered how modern day Native Americans have become obese, diabetic and sickly when they still eat lots of beans and corn tortillas. I don't know if it is the added fat in their diets or the fact that the maize (corn) of even a hundred years ago had much more protein in it than the hybrid corn of today.  It could be that they are eating beef  (hamburger) which was not a native food.

There are many examples - the whole nation of China has lived for thousands of years on a diet in which the main ingredient was rice.  This doctor claimed that the Irish used to live on nothing but potatoes and were healthy and strong.

The point was that starches give us energy and strength.  Athletes load up on carbs before a big game or race. He said there was enough protein in a potato to sustain us. During a period (I can't remember - 20 years maybe?) in Ireland, the population doubled while the people were eating almost nothing but potatoes. 

Something I have discovered on my own during this time of trying to eat better:  when I have a (small to medium) yukon gold potato with my meal, I do not have cravings after I eat. I eat the gold yukons because the brown and red potatoes make my joints ache - even to the smaller joints in my fingers. And doctors say that the gold and sweet potatoes are healing to stomach ulcers. I have a history of ulcers, so I want to eat things that are soothing to my stomach.

Two things I have learned in the past four weeks: A hearty breakfast helps rev up my metabolism, and eating a yellow potato with my meal stops food cravings.

I just bought a new bag of potatoes and will be experimenting with eating a potato one or more times a day. I am not talking about greasy fries or a baked potato with huge globs of butter and sour cream on top. I am talking about a steamed, boiled or baked potato with toppings that are not fattening. This will be a habit I will have to develop as I rarely eat potatoes, believing they were fattening and not good for me.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers (and sisters), whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."   James 1:1-4

Monday, October 4, 2010

Day 26 - Sunday - How am I coming with my goal?

What a day!  I didn't get much sleep Saturday night. This morning when the phone rang at 8:25 AM, I was exhausted. It was the friend who rides to church with me. She was hoping I was up and jumping around.  Hardly. Ugh. She tells me it is very cold outside and I should dress warmly.  I check the weather channel and find out it is 39 degrees outside - just 7 degrees above freezing. My whole plans of what I was going to wear must be changed.

I weighed.  Back to 258.5 - so it was dehydration that showed the loss on the scales on Saturday.

I wore black velour slacks, a black blouse, topped by a black and white leopard print velour jacket. When we arrive at church one of the greeters called me skinny girl.  Of course that made my day!

The strange thing is that I am pleased with the loss and the fact that my slacks were loose in the waist and hips.  It is strange because even though most of my adult life I have been overweight, I would have been very dismayed to weigh as much as I do now.  When I look at how actually big I still am, it can be discouraging, but I know that if I keep working at eating right, watching my calories and portions, that I will get even smaller and eventually reach my ultimate goal. 

Right now, my short term goal is to reach 250.  Things have moved so slowly since February that I see each ten pounds as a yard line on a football field.  I need to move the ball 100 yards.  But I'm not looking at the long football field and seeing how impossible it would be to pass, throw or run the ball 100 yards.  I'm going for the first down.  (Football fans will understand what I'm talking about.)  Every time I reach a 10 pound marker, 270, 260, 250, 240, I have achieved a first down. I can celebrate and aim for the next 10 yards or 10 pounds.  I started at 280 in February 2010.  Then 3-1/2 weeks ago I started with the 3D group. I was at 263 then, and have lost about 5 pounds at 258. Not a lot of gain, or loss, depending on perspective, but it is progress. But, I made it down to 260! That is 20 pounds lighter than 280. And now I'm aiming for 250. Someday I will be at 200. I am NOT trying. I am doing it.

Now for the clutter in my home. I took the plastic cups to church and gave them to the director of the ministry to the homeless. I also took 6 or 8 kippered snacks and some fish steaks (sardine steaks in a can) to give to the homeless.  I can't eat them, they give me indigestion.

There is so much similarity to the clutter in my home and the clutter on my body.  It didn't get that way over night and it will not go away over night.  It takes baby steps, routines, consistency, and the  mindset that this is not something I am trying to do, it is something I am doing and am going to accomplish no matter how long it takes.  I have considered the cost, the self discipline, the need to depend upon the Lord for strength to accomplish this, and I am committed.

"For which of  you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it -- lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it will begin to mock him, saying, "This man began to build and was not able to finish?"  Luke 14: 28-30

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Day 25 - Saturday Decluttering body and home

I can't see that anything looks better in my office, but a large wastebasket is so full of paper and magazines that it is too heavy for me to lift. I'm going to have to take things out and put in smaller bags to get to the dumpster.  I have filled the shredder basket twice. There is another sack of Toastmaster magazines; and still another sack full of miscellaneous things I'm throwing away.

I was telling a close friend and neighbor about my project, that I had "gifts" I had bought and never given that I needed to declutter.  She wanted to see them. So I took two boxes (18.5 pounds) of stuff over for her to look at and got rid of more stuff there. She took what she wanted and insisted on giving me some money for them.  She still got a bargain, and I got rid of some of my clutter. There is still some left. Some of the gifts I think I will set aside for Christmas, but the rest must go! 

Inside one of the boxes of gift items I found two long sleeves of plastic cups and a purple plastic tablecloth. I can't remember what event those came from. Maybe my family reunion that I hosted in 2004.  ha ha.  I will put them in my cabinet where I can see them. Perhaps I should offer them to my ladies group at church. Or, I could use them at home and save washing glasses. Any suggestions?

More clutter is coming off my body.  I weighed 256.5 today.  But I was dehydrated.  I could tell by my skin.  So, maybe that is not a true weight loss, just water. 

Right now I'm hungry and don't know what to eat. I'm out of peanut butter and yogurt.  I think I'll scramble some eggs.

Tomorrow is Sunday - the day of the week when I have so often failed.  I hope tomorrow I am able to maintain my weight loss.

May you have a blessed Sunday. 

Friday, October 1, 2010

Day 24 - Friday - My Declutter Guru

The 3-D group is not just about losing weight.  It's about "Eating well, Living well, and Loving God."  I am trying to unclutter body fat by eating better and watching portions; unclutter my mind by throwing down thoughts that are not of God, but come from my accuser and temper, the Devil: and unclutter my home by getting rid of things that I have held on to for far too long.  It is the living well part - uncluttering my living space - that I will be talking about today.

The clutter in my home is as hard to reveal as is the pounds on the scale.  But this is about being real, facing our selves with the truth and not denial.

I have a very special person in my life with whom I feel safe to tell about my struggles with stuff!  He has the same problem that I have but for different reasons. He moved from a large place into a one bedroom apartment three years ago, and still has unpacked boxes everywhere because there is no where to put things.

 We have talked about decluttering before.  He was at my home in August for the first time in years and was pleasantly surprised at how nice it looked.  (I didn't let him in the office - that is where I stuffed everything I couldn't find a place for.)  But there were no boxes under the table or desk, no boxes lined against the walls, and no two-drawer filing cabinet in the living room pretending it was a TV stand or end table. It looked really nice.  And he said so with admiration. And then said, "Where are the things stacked against the wall that you talked about?  It looks fine in here to me."  I then said I had worked very hard to get things the way they were. ( And boy, had I worked!)

So tonight we are talking and I tell him that I am thinking about quilts that were given to me by deceased ancestors. The quilts have been used for years and had started breaking down, decaying, and so I quit using them and put them in the cedar chest. I didn't want to get rid of them, no one else would want them, and they weren't nice enough to use. In fact, using them would damage them even more. As we discussed why I hung on to them, it was because of who gave them to me or made them for me when I was just a girl.  He helped me to realize that if the quilts were too ragged for me to want to use them on my bed, then I shouldn't keep them. The folks who gave them to me would be glad I got so much use out of them, and would not expect me to keep them forever, especially when they were ragged. He said I can still hold the memory of their love and the quilts they made even though I let them go.

He mentioned again how nice my apartment was in August when he visited. I admitted to him that I had stuffed everything I could not find a place for into my office.  He then said I probably had dragged everything back out and cluttered up my home again.  I said, "No, I haven't dragged anything out and back into the living areas, but every time I go into my office it is so depressing and overwhelming. I hate going in there.  (That is where my computer is, folks, so here I sit in the "dump" writing this to you.)

We talked about all kinds of things that I have been unable to make a decision on letting go.  I don't know if I can convey to you what he conveyed to me, but he helped me to realize that these things had been useful in the past and were no longer useful. So, it was alright to get rid of them. He didn't want me spending energy trying to find someone that might benefit from the things I no longer used. He wanted me
put them in the trash can and then take them to the dumpster.

I argued that many of these things WERE useful. He said I was confusing functional with useful.  Yes, they may still function, but if I am not using them, they are not useful to me.  Let them go! 

He also said it is a waste of time and energy to try to figure out why I started saving stuff and got myself into this mess. That is another distraction that just wears me down. 

We talked for an hour and a half. He closed with a recap of what he had told me before. And then said that when I got off the phone the first thing I saw that I no longer enjoyed or used, to put it in the trash. That making decisions would strengthen my decision maker.  I love this guy!  LOL

I got off the phone and went to the bathroom. The first thing that caught my eye was a bottle of skin cleanser that was about ten years old. I had found it months ago with still some cleanser in the bottle and had put it upside down in my metal box that contains my daily skin care products.  My thinking months ago was to use that last ounce or two so I wouldn't be throwing away money.  Tonight I "saw" it, probably for the first time in a long time. It was no longer in my vision. I picked it up and thought about it.  If it is ten years old, then it probably has grown bacteria and isn't fit to use. If I haven't used it in all this time, well, you know the drill.  Throw it away!  I did! 

Then I went through the drawers in my bathroom cabinet and found toothpaste tubes that I thought I could squeeze and coax one more bit of toothpaste out of the tube.  After throwing away all kinds of little things that had expired or looked gunky, or I hadn't used in a long time, I then contemplated some of the things that are harder to part with in the office.

Tomorrow is a new day, and I plan to attack my throwing away with vigor. I want to be able to come into my office and it feel like a place I want to be, not a place that I would be embarrassed for anyone to see.  I want my whole home to be beautiful.

One thing my friend kept repeating to me . . . "It's time to move on.  It's a new season in your life. Get rid of the old to make room for the new."   I smile when I think about that.  Yes, I'm ready for the new season. I want to be ready for the new to come. 

Col 3:2  Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth.

Day 23 - Thursday I'm back down to 258.5

I am guessing that the big breakfast yesterday did rev up my metabolism. Today, I was back down to 258.5.

I walked about two long blocks today, standing up straight with good posture and was able to do so while walking fairly normally.   The last stretch of sidewalk between the two buildings my hip went out. I limped the last 25 or 30 feet. But walking that far standing straight up without the hip going out is good news.  I am encouraged.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Day 22 - Weds - Beginning Week 4

Today is check in - weigh in day.  I wish I could say that the scales are in my favor. They are not. I weigh the same as I did a week ago, 260 pounds.  The couple of days that I was at 258 were ruined on Sunday.

Today I started off with a big breakfast, hoping to jump start my metabolism.  Two scrambled eggs, 1 piece healthy nut bread, 1 tsp mayo, 1 slice pineapple and 1/2 cup plain yogurt.

My computer is running very slow, so I can't access the website for calorie counts. Can't do much of anything with computer acting this way.

I did get in vegetables and fruits today.  But I also ate caramel popcorn while watching a movie.

I cried during the movie, "Letters to Juliet".  I had seen it before, and knew what was going to happen, but I still cried. I'm a real softie when it comes to movies that touch the heart. Movies depicting real love, and not necessarily of the romantic version. The scene of the older Claire touching the face of young Sophie so tenderly and then brushing her wet hair was deeply moving. I could feel the love.  There was plenty of romance too, as Claire searched for the boy she loved and had ran away from 50 years earlier. But now they both are senior citizens, that is, if he is still alive. And if she finds him, will he remember her?

Of course, all the important characters in this movie were slender. :)

"How great is the love the Father has lavished upon us."  I John, 3:1